I received a lovely letter off a very special client of ours who wanted to share with us how her recent treatment- a lash lift- made her feel. Reading it I was very touched by the openness and vulnerability of her feelings. I also felt very sad as it reflected just how harshly we as women judge ourselves and how we can feel judged by other women and society as we age. It brings up some conflicted feelings of my own on the natural aging process V beauty treatments.
Are we doing women a disservice by offering beauty treatments? Are we telling women that you are not ok as you are? You need to look younger, smoother, prettier… Or are helping women to transition into old age gracefully, helping to boost self-esteem and confidence and revitalise lost youth through subtle yet effective ways? To me, I think it depends on the intention behind the why. Are you coming from a place of self-loathing e.g ‘I hate my face/skin/hair and wish it looked like <fill in the blank> or are you coming from a place of self-love e.g ‘I love and respect my body and I’m going to look after it and treat it well for as long as I can thereby taking this time for this treatment is just the icing on an already delicious cake’ Here is my clients letter, with permission to share, but keeping it anonymous: “I am a woman heading, no galloping towards 65yr old, far too quickly for my liking. You never notice how quickly you suddenly start to age. Suddenly you wake up one morning and think ‘My God, havnt I gone old!?’. At some point we look in the mirror and think ‘I feel invisible’. Thinning hair, saggy jowels, wrinkles where you don’t want them! No wonder people don’t see you.
I began to wonder ‘What can I do to lessen this unwelcome change in me?’ I don’t want to look twenty again and be accused of mutton dressed as lamb or for women to look at me and think I’m trying to hard so when I found out it was possible to lift and tint my nonexistent lashes, to give them fullness and definition, that sounded perfect to me so off I went to the salon. I was worried that I didn’t have many eyelashes to work with in fact I was convinced that I only had about 6 eyelashes on each eye! 1st Surprise! The beautician said I had more than enough eyelashes, most women think they have thinned with age but really we can’t see them as our eyesight has gone downhill with everything else. (The beautician didn’t say that). I lay down on the couch and spent a lovely hour having my lashes lifted and tinted and my brows waxed and tinted. What a transformation! I could see the definition in my face and inside I felt good and confident, amazed at how such a simple treatment could be so easy. My face felt recognisable to ME! My eyes looked like they did 45yrs ago without looking false AND the fact that they would stay like that for weeks.
I realise its not possible to halt the onward journey of age, but to have a little help, not obvious, but enhancing and more importantly something as simple as thicker looking eyelashes that makes me feel visible again.
That was all it took because if we feel good, it shows in our eyes.” Anon. 65yrs.